La Casita

I have written previously about how important it was for Mom to have her own house.   From as far back as I could remember, even before my teenage years, mom would sit by me on my bed and say, "Rafy, cuando tu crezca, tu me compra una casita?"  (Ralphy - when you grow older, would you buy me a house?)  I don't recall Mom ever ask for anything else.  I am sure there were lots of other things she wished for or wanted but she never let me know.

Mom was very simple.  She basically had two things on her bucket list.  Her home and her family.  She was happy with life because she had both.  

Mom grew up very poor, as my Dad told us, on dirt floors and surely had days where she would go to bed hungry.  She lived down the hill from Dad.  When I say down the hill, you could say at the bottom of the mountainside where Dad lived.  

Years ago, in the early '80s I had a chance to go to Jayuya with Luisa and I was able to see where it was that Mom lived when she was a child.  There was no real way to get to mom's house, unless it was climbing down the side of the mountain, from the main road where dad lived.  It easily took about 10 minutes on a steep incline.

When I went there, the house that mom lived in was gone.  The only thing standing was the remnants of a structure, such as 3-4 blocks, a bit of cement for the kitchen area, but everything else was gone.

There was this big tree, around the base of the property, that had a special seed that I had never seen before.  

I grabbed a bag full of those seeds, called Mato Rojo or by the official name: Canavalia nitida and to this day, still have the bag.  In the attached spanish link, it says that this is one of the most utilized items in the making of jewelry by artisans in Puerto Rico.

My cousins tell me that if you rub the seed against the concrete, they spark, generate a flame and heat.  They said that this is something they did with it when they were younger. 

Whenever I look at those seeds, I am reminded of the struggles that my mom and her family had and how far along she came, and us after that.  I love the symbolism of it.   From the base at the bottom of this steep hill, there is a tree that produces the hardest and strongest seeds.  I saw that strength in my mom.

When they retired and moved down to South Carolina Mom and Dad bought the first and only home they would ever own.  Prior to moving to SC, mom working at K-Mart, would buy things for her casita.  The one that she was going to get, when she retired.

They spent several amazing years in "la casita".  Every birthday & holiday would be celebrated at Mom's house.  Yes, it was Dad's as well, but to Mom, it was her dream house.  The one she always desired and deserved.

During her battle with her late stages of Alzheimer's, she would cry and say she wanted to go home.  Not realizing of course that she was home.

Dad passed away first and Mom followed him a little over a year later.  The house was transferred to my 3 sisters and I.

Mom wanted a large family.  Raised as the only female by her father and her 3 brothers, losing her mom at the age of 6, she wanted nothing but a big family.  She adored her children, grandchildren and even got to meet most of her great grandchildren.  Though by this time, she was so far on the losing side of her Alzheimer's battle that she could not tell the difference between her own descendent, a complete stranger's child or even the plastic doll she would cuddle in her arms.

Dad would have wanted us to sell the house to anybody at whatever price we could get for it.  Mom though, would have clearly wanted for her Casita to stay "within the family" if possible.  For a family member to start building a future of memories based on the foundation she had laid, or better yet, the seeds that she had planted.  

Today, just 2 weeks shy of when Mom and Dad bought their Casita back on Valentine's Day in 2006, exactly 16 years ago, we sold La Casita to Kayla.  One of Mom's grandchildren.   

We got to close another chapter in this book about Mom and Dad.  The last chapter of our responsibility to Mom and Dad to take care of their possessions.  It took longer than all of us would have imagined and we could have chosen the easy path but sometimes the more difficult path is the right thing to do.  

To Kayla - Congratulations on purchasing your first home.  It is even more memorable as you are the 2nd owner on a home that was originally owned by your grandparents.  They left Puerto Rico before anyone of us was born, with the hopes of making a better future for all of us.   You and that house are both a direct result of that hope.